HELPING HANDS

2 WEEKS

Its been almost 2 weeks since my husband flew to his new duty stations. He is doing well, you can tell that being away from his one true love “his daughter” is the hardest thing he has ever done. He is so strong but doesn’t give himself enough credit!

Men, it is okay to cry! Tears show a different kind of strength. He is a passionate man, and as much as it breaks my heart to see him hurt, it warms my hard to know he isn’t afraid to show his true self to me, his daughters, and even some of his co-workers. Sure they may poke fun, but you know what, FUCK EM! If those co-workers can’t respect who he is and what he sacrifices, then those are not the ones to surround himself with. Okay rant over……

HELPING HANDS

I served for the US Navy, 8 years. I choose to separate in 2013. As an active duty person, the community is strong and bold, but sitting on the other side as a spouse, the community and bond is 10x’s stronger. A military family is family, plain and simple.

The past 2 weeks, the military community has been there for me and my daughter more than i can express. Calling to check up on us, inviting us out to their place for dinner, coming over to my home for coffee, beach play dates, and dropping their day to spend with me at the ball park.

Now its not just the military community that i cherish, but my Church family as well. I cling to my church family. They have been in my life before my daughter made her debut. They gave me my first try at taking care of children in the Kids Ministry. It is there  I learned something about myself, I have no patience. And still don’t. I pray for patience EVERY DARN DAY!

FRIENDSHIPS

Friendships are what you make of them. They can be strong, subtle, or even the whats up how ya doing  type. However with each friendship you build it to what fits your circle. My friendships are categorized by Church, Military, Softball, and everything else. They are 3 completely different categorize and they each hit a spot in my heart. Some too over lap! THOSE ARE THE BEST FRIENDSHIPS!

I am going to be a little selfish, I love my different families, because each help me out so that i can have my healthy release of playing  ball. Everyone has their outlet, mine just happens to be on a dirt field, with a dusty glove, a 11inch or 12inch yellow stitch ball, playing a team sport where you can be play your position but play as a team. I get 50-55 mins each game of pure no worries and just play. I said I was going to be selfish, its because I am blessed with friends who are willing to lend a helping hand and help me with my daughter.

20 Days

You Got This

Day 1, you didn’t make it, stiff margaritas, anger,

Day 2, I’m on the list! Yay! —–now what, phone calls, breakfast excitement joy

Day 3, still waiting for word on what to do.

Day 4, no word yet, what to do. I’m watching my husband work on his workbook. 9pm read books watch movie in bed with little one, she wants daddy. I explain daddy working.

Day 5, really day 1 of the season for us. 4am whole house is up. One car, I’m am getting shit done! Kid is dressed rocking bed head, I’m in pjs rocking a fish hat, husbands in his is blue and gold PT gear ready to get his sweat on.
Coughing like crazy, “Hunny you okay…?”
“Yeah, I’m fi…..” runs to the bathroom and pukes….
“Here’s your bagel, just breath hun, it’s the nerves. Something new and different. You got this”
“Thanks babe” he responds.

As we get in our One Car, we head towards the base. On the silent hwy of 15S.
“I’m excited and sad” as he turned to look at me. Our daughter is singing moana in the back seat. “Why is that?” Stupid question…. because it gave me the feels as soon as he answered.
” I’m supposed to be on leave spending time with my family, before I go over seas for 2 years”…… silence from both of us.

The Challenge

We found out in March he got selected for orders over seas. He is doing an                  unaccompanied tour for 18-24 months. We say 24 just in case thing get screwy, but we are hoping for the later, 18 months would be way cooler!

Your probably asking why unaccompanied? Why would anyone put their families through that? Isn’t that just asking for problems? All great questions, however simple truth, while he is out there we would never see him.

He would be working so much. With watch standing duties, his schedule rotation of in and outs. The experience would be fun, but the truth, I don’t want to pull my daughter from her school, church, friends, and family.

FaceTime will be our number one source of communication.

All this has happened before 7am.

As the day passed we keep getting mixed news. No one knows what going on. Will he stay? Will he go? Do I get to be there with him when the moment comes or will I will be thousand of miles away watching this once in a lifetime event on social media, FaceTime, or just mere seconds captured throughout a lens.

He’s leaving. Im crying, my daughters looking at me puzzled, and my dog well she keeps shedding.

20 Days.